8 February 2012, 7:41 pm
I would like your thoughts on this scene, how is the dialogue? can you get a feel for it? where do you think it's going?...The characters looks and the setting are already established by this point so ive not gone onto too much detail with that, the main focus is on the conversation. its just the first draft. - The late afternoon sun bore down on Matt as he headed over to the Tavern; He had spent most of the day in bed nursing his hangover from last night’s drinking antics with Shaun. Shaun had dragged himself to basketball training earlier on as his season was to start next week. Matt lifted his shades from his eyes as he walked into the Tavern only to be met by a look from Hannah that could cut through glass as she walked out the Tavern. He walked straight past without saying a word to her and headed straight to the bar. There were students scattered around the Tavern but it wasn’t too busy, however the stage to the far left was getting set up for another open mic night later on. Amy greeted him as he sat at the bar with his head buried in his hands; he heard her voice over the chatter of other students standing at the bar, “Heavy night again?” Matt slowly lifted his head to greet her caring hazel eyes, “Me and Shaun decided to play drinking games with a full bottle of bourbon.” She chuckled as she handed him a glass of orange juice, “So who won?” “Well I’m here feeling like sh*t, and Shaun’s managed to go to basketball training. So I guess he did.” Her tender hand reached out onto his arm, “Don’t let him hear you say that. You won’t hear the end of it.” Matt agreed with her as he rubbed his eyes a little before looking out towards the door, “So looks like Hannah’s starting to make friends then. I saw her with that guy as she walked out.” “Oi leave her alone.” Matt sat up straight as he gulped down his orange juice, “Me? Mate, she was the one that bit my head off yesterday. I didn’t even say anything to her!” Amy shook her head as she walked round to this side of the bar to sit next to Matt, “I heard. She told me. But you need to really lay off her; she is really going through a tough time. You need to stop bullying her.” Matt laughed off Amy’s accusations, “Will stop with this bullying sh*t, I’m just taking the piss, you saw how she was with me before she came here. Now all of a sudden you’re making her out to be a victim.” Amy shook her head, gripping onto his arm tighter, “I’m being serious, leave her alone!” “Why? Other than her being a bit*h to me, what has she been through that I need to be sympathetic towards her about?” Amy pressed her thin lips together, thinking carefully before she looked Matt square in the eyes making sure she had his full attention, “She lost everything. They kicked her out from the other side, she had to come here. She has no money, no friends, no family, she is absolutely broke. As cheap as the college is making it for her, she doesn’t know how she’s going to pay her fees. She hardly has any money for food; I’m feeding her at the moment. This girl had everything she has ever wanted at her finger tips all her life, now she has nothing. She is alone and she’s scared! Imagine how that feels.” Matt broke eye contact with her and ran his fingers through his hair as Amy’s words sank in, he looked a little distant, "Yeah that is f*ck*d up." He did know how that felt. In fact he knew all too well how it felt. He stopped himself from drifting back to a flashback from back in England by grabbing his empty glass and asking Amy for another drink.... Read More »
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