30 July 2010, 7:20 am
My boyfriend of five years lied to me and took steroids. He had fits of rage and emotionally abused me. He was never home anymore and when he was he was yelling at me. Then he became very very sick and ended up in the hospital because of the steroids. He almost needed a liver transplant. This went on for months and his behavior was terrible. He would threaten suicide and scream and yell at me constantly. One night I went out with friends from work. I had way to much to drink. I was borderline blackout drunk. Something I never do, but none the less it happened that night. Anyway one of my male friends came on to me. He got on top of me. I told him no, but we ended up having sex. My dress never came off. He just pushed my clothes to the side. Anyway I told my boyfriend what I did and told him that I needed to move out. I got an apartment, but he wouldn't let me leave. He told me he loved me and wanted to work things out. A month later my boyfriend went to England back to his family to finish recovering from his steroid use. We talked everyday on Skype. He was so sweet. I took care of his house and paid the bills. Then he came home. Everything was good for a week and then he said I love you but I'm not in love with you because of what you did. I am very angry because I wanted to move out 8 months ago when this happened, but he wanted to work things out. I have lived in his house for 5 years and have helped to pay his mortgage. I have no savings and no where to go. He said maybe if you leave I can get over what you did and you can come back. It's been 8 months since I cheated and he was gone for 4 of the months. Who is wrong here? I've said sorry a million times. I know I would never do this again. He never said sorry to me for taking the steroids and not telling me. He never apologized for verbally abusing me. One additional bit of information. When my boyfriend became sick my doctor prescribed me Xanax to deal with everything. The night that I went out with my friends and cheated I had taken it along with drinking. I'm not making excuses for what I did. I know I was wrong , but I think he is wrong too. I just don't understand. Please just give me your opinion.... Read More »
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